The results of the inductive thematic analysis indicated four overarching themes in the data: (1) lack of patient centered care prior to diagnosis; (2) patient misunderstanding of symptoms; (3) experienced weight stigma; and (4) diagnosis as a golden ticket to treatment and stigma-reduced care. Each of these themes is reviewed below.
Lack of patient-centered care
Lack of patient-centered care prior to diagnosis often took two forms: (1) provider miscommunication, and (2) medical gaslighting. These sub-themes are described below.
Provider miscommunication. In the beginning stages of their investigations, participants reported difficulties in communication with their primary care providers. Honey stated that she was “going back and forth continually, feeling like I wasn’t being heard, feeling like I had to fight for every… For every feeling. I had to try to justify everything I was saying.” Similarly, Abby noted: “I’d started to wake up in the morning with little bruises on my body like almost like a fingerprint. And I thought that was weird and I brought it up to her … And she was like oh that, there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s fine.” Participants described confusion and worry when they perceived that something was wrong but did not perceive they were being taken seriously by their primary care provider.
Sometimes, miscommunication made the diagnostic process even more challenging, as was the case when Bethany was asked about stretch marks by her family doctor:
I remember my family doctor asking me at one point, do you have stretch marks? And I said, ‘no, I don’t have stretch marks. Last time I had them was when I was pregnant. And that was many years ago.’ But he didn’t describe the stretch marks. I was thinking of the pregnancy stretch marks with the fine white lines. And he must have thought about Cushing’s with the striae that are wide and purple. But there was no description of them. If I had [a description], I would have shown them immediately!
Christy noted how phone appointments may have negatively impacted her diagnostic process:
All of this went down in the [COVID-19] pandemic, so I actually never met a doctor in person about this ever. … I explain the weight gain I’m like kay I was 110. Now I’m 230 and these are the bursts. These are when it happened. Um, but they actually never saw me, not once, not even over zoom it was all over the phone … When I explained how much I gained they were just like, no.
In general, participants felt like they were not receiving the care they hoped for from their primary care provider. For example, Abby said that “Cushing’s patients have a lot of things going on and most regular doctors when they see you…they think you’re a hypochondriac because there’s always something wrong with [you].” Participants perceived their primary care providers as missing the big picture. Darby recognized that “I think each time I went into the doctor for the different things, … I would go in for specific things, but we never sort of put them all together as to what it was.” In describing her frustration with this process, Emily said: “And I’m just like how many other people are struggling with stuff like this, and they just get [dismissed].” Together, this miscommunication contributed, in part, to the delayed diagnosis, as it took time for providers to recognize the possible diagnosis of Cushing’s.
Medical gaslighting. Medical gaslighting is the process by which medical professionals will downplay, dismiss, or silence a patients’ view of their illness [26]. Abby described her experience with the first primary care provider she consulted: “he basically told me that I had mental baggage, and it was that I was a head case and that was my problem.” After moving to a different city, she described the next provider she met with as having a similarly dismissing response: “I also explained to her what was going on. I said I think there’s something wrong, I exercise and the harder the exercise more I gain weight. She basically said you’re not trying hard enough and suggested the South Beach diet to me.” Besides their weight, other symptoms were also dismissed. Emily said:
It was always passed off as oh, your high-stress job, high-stress family life, you’re depressed; those were always the comments to me. You’re just depressed, you’re just anxious because of this stuff and blah blah, blah. … As time went on the symptoms started multiplying. So, I’m like it’s not just not sleeping and depressed and anxious I’m like… my resting heart rate is in the 160’s without moving um, my vision’s starting to get impaired, I feel like I’m crazy, um and then the weight gain started. And once again they just said oh you know take up, take up cycling. That’s what the doctor told me.
In describing her experiences with feeling downplayed or dismissed, Honey stated:
I had swollen hands and feet, too, so he said, Well, you’re gonna have to get your diet under control, and I said well my diet is really good actually and I’ve been going to weight watchers for a year, haven’t dropped a pound, so there’s an issue there. And again, he would just chalk it up to PMS.
Honey also experienced skin sensitivities and was told she simply needed to use sunscreen more frequently. During the diagnostic process, Christy experienced medical gaslighting when completing her 24-hour urine free cortisol test:
I did the test and waited months again for my results. And then it came back super high. And so, he accused me of doing the test wrong. He said there’s no way um this makes sense. You need to do the test again. So, then I did the test again. And it was high again. And he accused me of doing it wrong again. And I was like, I’m telling you like I don’t know what you, I’ve got the instructions in front of me. … And so I did it again, and it came back like again in the thousands. … I did feel like I was going nuts, the same way when he kept telling me I was doing the test wrong.
Patient misunderstanding of symptoms
Participants also described misunderstanding their symptoms, which highlights a further breakdown in patient-provider communication about their disease, as these misperceptions were not clarified for them upon diagnosis and treatment. Participants appeared to hyper-fixate on, and misunderstand, their weight gain. They also misunderstood other symptoms as related to weight. Emily noted this fixation on weight directly when she said: “In the very beginning I noticed the weight gain first to be honest.” Abby shared that she decided to approach a health professional because of her weight gain:
I was a happy, healthy active athletic person, and all of a sudden something in my life happened where I just kept gaining weight and gaining weight. No matter how much like exercising or eating properly that I had done… The catalyst for me going to the doctor was, um, I noticed a bunch of stretch marks on my stomach and to me that was a sign of like rapid weight gain in such a small amount of time.
Like Abby, other participants misunderstood their weight gain and attempted to engage in behavioural changes to reverse this process. Bethany said:
Thankfully I did not have a doctor that told me to go and exercise and eat less. But when you did that, you still gained weight. The more I exercised, the more walking I did, the less I ate, the more I gained and the rounder the face got. And the more hair I lost.
Similarly, Christy described her weight gain as the catalyst behind her decision to hire a personal trainer:
I kind of decided based on super significant weight gain that I was going to invest in a personal trainer… So, I was with the personal trainer for about three months, and was only gaining weight, like I was cutting calories and working out I think it was like 12 times a week. … But everything was just getting worse. Like I was weaker, I couldn’t do things the same way that I used to, like the stretch marks were nuts I kept gaining weight I didn’t know why, despite still I was still walking every day and doing what I could.
When describing their experience of symptom onset prior to receiving their diagnosis, participants understood many of their physical changes as connected to their weight gain. This was especially true for those experiences that surrounded muscle weakening and movement, despite these being Cushing’s symptoms that are independent from weight. Bethany recalls how, when called for her appointment in her primary care provider’s waiting room, she “staggered to stand up and was almost immobile to a point, I was so big,” an experience she attributed to her weight gain. As symptoms worsened, participants felt disconnected from their bodies. Emily said: “I can’t trust [my] own body,” and Christy felt “so exhausted” because “of course that’s exhausting. Like, carrying all that [weight] around is tiring. Like, if you’re not exhausted, that would be weird.”
Participants also noted a misunderstanding of other Cushing’s symptoms, both alongside and independent of their weight gain. In recognizing the impact of stress on her symptoms, Honey said:
I opened a business, and the stress came back because of that, and then everything came to a head. Then I got the bruising, then I got the buffalo shoulders, then I got the big moon face. … People were starting to say, like is your whole life okay? It was kind of insulting. And then I got the big belly, and it just got bigger and bigger, and within 3 weeks I had gained 25lbs.
Darby noted that, in the fullness of her busy life, it was easy to explain away her symptoms:
I didn’t acknowledge what was going on it, I just didn’t push to find out why. I was always able to find a reason in my own brain or my own thinking as to all, you know. You know, I’m just I’m working too much and this will pass, and then it’ll get better. Or, you know, when I was falling down for no reason, it was like oh man you just got to pay more attention. All right, you know, I need to eat better because I’m not, you know, exercising. When I was gaining the weight and went to weight watchers and some reason the weight wasn’t coming off. … And I’m thinking, I’m doing all the right stuff.
Similarly, Franny described how she perceived her symptoms to be related to anxiety:
Oh, it’s just anxiety you’re always… It’s like the palpitations Oh, it’s just you’re nervous about something. … I guess I just… in my case, like I haven’t… maybe they caught it so soon enough that, like I haven’t really got to the point where like I’m I’m feeling a lot of symptoms?
Experienced weight stigma
Participants described numerous experiences of weight stigma in healthcare while seeking a diagnosis. Invalidation occurred when patients’ personal accounts of their illness were dismissed or not taken seriously, as described in the Lack of Patient Centered Care sub-themes. While many participant experiences of medical gaslighting can also be regarded as experiences of weight stigma, these themes were differentiated by whether or not participants reported they were dismissed or silenced, consistent with the definition of gaslighting [21].
Participants contributed their negative experiences, at least in part, to their weight. Participant’s felt like there was a significant difference in how they were treated by practitioners before the onset of their Cushing’s symptoms. Christy contrasted her experiences in healthcare pre- and post- Cushing’s: “When I went to the doctor and I was concerned about something as a kid, nobody ever doubted me like. And yeah, since then … people in general just don’t get [taken] seriously looking the way that I do. And don’t respect me as much it seems.” Although Christy spoke of “people in general,” this sentiment included her primary healthcare provider. Similarly, Honey described a perceived change in her relationship with her primary care provider pre- and post- Cushing’s onset and felt that her weight contributed to this change. She described her once positive relationship as one that is now associated with hurt:
Prior to Cushing’s my doctor was very forthcoming. I would tell him what I needed if I needed, felt I needed blood work, or felt I needed anything, or suggested that I…. maybe he’s not the one to help me that I need to see a specialist he would send me on to that specialist. So, yes, I always felt hurt by him.
Abby summarized participants’ experiences when she said: “Judging books by covers that’s, that’s what the healthcare system seems to do and I do feel that, like some of my treatment was definitely due to my body [size] and what, what they preconceived that I was a fat person, so it was my fault.” Franny described having requested her entire medical file and that seeing herself repeatedly referred to as a “morbidly obese female” in emails and other communication had a negative impact on her body image and self-esteem.
Diagnosis as a golden ticket
Post-diagnosis, participants experienced a profound sense of relief and validation, perceived themselves to be lucky to have received a diagnosis, and were thankful for the subsequent treatment they received. Bethany said: “once you get a diagnosis, it doesn’t matter what the diagnosis is, you’ve got a diagnosis and now we work towards that. Let’s correct it”. Christy felt like “Having that diagnosis under my belt was like a golden ticket … everything was easier.” Abby declared that the doctor who officially diagnosed her saved her life: “She had taken the time to like, say I believe you. Instead of just seeing a fat person and blaming it on me, which is really what the healthcare system does. Really it ruins people.” After waiting three years for a diagnosis, Darby stated that she felt “very lucky” and said:
From when my doctor said to me ‘I think it’s Cushing’s’ to when the actual diagnosis was, it was fast. It was weeks. It was, it was very, very quick. …Once we actually knew what it was to actually being able to have the surgery to have the tumor removed and start reversing the process of what was going on with my body. So. I was very lucky.
In hindsight, participants noticed there was a difference in how they were treated by healthcare professionals pre- and post-diagnosis. Abby said: “I firmly believe that there is a correlation there between how I was treated before, and then how I was treated after.” She elaborated to say that: “people have to believe me now, because a specialist has said, ‘This is what I have, and you may not understand it, but I do’.” Emily noted that “after I got the diagnosis my family doctor was very, very open, and caring with moving forward. And he commended me for pushing and knowing that things were wrong, and he was really good about it, and he apologised that it took long to get figured out.” Honey also noted” “I’d have to say like during the diagnosis, not great, but since I’ve had my pituitary tumor removed great, the aftercare has been fantastic.”